Uwe Boll is an enigma.

He is an un-explained phenomena.

Uwe Boll is Satan.

The German-born Dr. Uwe Boll is literally the worst director ever to walk this planet. The only movies I can think of that may just be worse than his are the recent spurt of horrid spoof movies that have come out like Date Movie, Epic Movie, and Meet the Spartans. But those movies are spoofs and no one even actually writes them or directs them; everyone shows up, they turn on a camera, everyone chugs a bottle of whiskey, and they re-enact a few episodes of E! Entertainment News. With Boll, he actually tries and puts “effort” into his movies. The only reason that they’re better than those spoof movies is because of how funny they are! I assure you, House of the Dead was not meant to be funny, but watch it and you will laugh and laugh and laugh. Seriously.

Many people have prayed that this man would stop making movies and it seems that hope might actually have a small sliver of chance to become a reality! You see, someone started a little petition to get Uwe Boll to never touch a movie again, which had 18,000 signatures. When asked about this, the director said that it wasn’t enough but if 1,000,000 people signed it, he would never direct again.

Since then, the number has climbed to 31,061 and is rising every second.

Please, for the sake of humanity. Have a heart. Sign this petition. You can do your part to help save the planet from terrible movies.

Keep in mind, Uwe Boll movies are scientifially proven to stunt growth and ignite mental illness… and yes, it is contagious.

Whether the man actually goes through with this or not, who knows. He did challenge anyone who spoke negatively of him to a boxing match and kept his word there, so he seems to be the honest type.

Here is the link to the petition. Make sure you tell all of your friends and family and neighbors and complete strangers to sign it as well.

Thank you for your time.

Together, we can change the world.