“My power will astound you! Observe as I detach my limb, and transform it into a deadly weapon!”

— Arm-Fall-Off-Boy

That name has to be a joke right. Right? But no, it’s far too real. Arm-Fall-Off-Boy was created by Gerard Jones and Curt Swan and had his first appearance in DC Comics in Secret Origins Volume 2, #46 in November 1989. The futuristic hero has the unique ability to detach his limbs and beat his enemies down with them. Since Marvel is raking in the dough with obscure heroes from their catalog like the Guardians of the Galaxy, and Netflix’s Jessica Jones, Luke Cage, and Iron Fist, DC figures if you can’t beat them, join them, and is literally scraping the barrel for forgotten characters.

In 1977, the world was amazed and delighted by the now iconic film Star Wars. The following year, a short parody film by the name of Hardware Wars found its way into the hearts of millions. With characters by the name of Fluke Starbucker, Augie “Ben” Doggie, Princess Anne-Droid, Ham Salad, and Chewchilla the Wookiee Monster, the short film’s cast was an obvious tongue-in-cheek referencing to the original Star Wars roles. Household equipment made up the vast majority of props in the parody, hence the name. Hilarious and goofy, the video lampoon was and is a cult classic to this day. As a matter of fact, I just watched it again and laughed all the way through.

HBO’s True Blood series was a phenomenal hit by any measurement. Based on The Southern Vampire Mysteries series of novels by Charlaine Harris, they follow the adventures of Sookie Stackhouse, a telepath in Louisiana who possesses an extraordinary lack of self-preservation. Constantly in danger, she aligns herself with and against supernatural creatures like vampires and werewolves, all the while seeking to find her place in the world. Sookie, played by Anna Paquin in all seven seasons, finally seems to find herself living a normal life after the end of the final season. But fans have continued to clamor for more. Will HBO ever deliver?

Turns out Batman v Superman was just the beginning of the DC universe’s superhero brawling. While Ben Affleck and Henry Cavill kept their battle confined to the big screen, several other actors associated with the famed comic brand got bloody and bruised today. At an early screening in Hollywood for the blockbuster hit, critics were shocked to witness a melee between TV’s Flash Grant Gustin and DCU Flash-to-be Ezra Miller.

In a development so stunning it made me drop a cup of coffee on my foot this morning, Daredevil – the self-proclaimed nocturnal protector of Hell’s Kitchen (the neighborhood in New York, not the cooking show with that perpetually angry British dude) – has revealed that he has become a born again Christian and will no longer battle crime as Daredevil.

“I can no longer continue my fight against the criminal element of this city while dressed as a poorly-attired minion of the dark lord Satan,” Daredevil said to the assembled press early this morning. “I am now….Risk-Averse Angel!”