Two lovely and talented young women, Allie Goertz and her friend Megan (no last name given), have composed a song set to an epic poem written by comedian Patton Oswalt that appeared in his book Zombie Spaceship Wasteland released earlier this year. They made a video of their effort which you can check it after the jump.
Oswalt wrote “Song for Ulvaak” as a tribute to the many hours he spent during his youth playing Dungeons & Dragons, and Ulvaak was the last character he ever created before his teenage hormones took permanent hold. Ulvaak was a half-orc assassin who carried a sentient sword called Bloodgusher (seriously). He was the ultimate Oswalt D&D character, but young Patton also realized that he would need to part ways with the vicious rogue if he was to ever become a man.
From “Prelude to ‘The Song of Ulvaak'”, taken from Zombie Spaceship Wasteland:
“Ulvaak stood, in dragon-hide armor and a tattered cloak, holding Bloodgusher one-handed. The demon who ruled this hell plane – I forget his name – parlayed with Ulvaak, offering to send him back to the material plane of existence if he’d act as the demon’s messenger and assassin. Ulvaak served no man, monster, or demon. Knowing that slaying the demon lord would, in effect, destroy the hell plane he now stood on (it being a manifestation of the demon’s ambition and avarice), he slung Bloodgusher like a burning shard from a graveyard explosion. It sliced the demon from shoulder to belly, and Ulvaak, the Black Blade of Gamotia, laughed as nameless damnation disintegrated beneath him and a sky of blood swallowed him whole.
“Then I went to a pool party – the first one I was skinny enough to swim at without my shirt. I made out with a girl, and the curve of her hip and the soft jut of shoulder blades in a bikini forever trumped the imagined sensation of a sword pommel or spell book.”