“My name is Jim Kimmel” [dramatic pause] “and I teach.”

Jimmy Kimmel hosted a special late night edition of Jimmy Kimmel Live after the 87th Annual Academy Awards last night with this “seriously” guffaw-worthy bit called “The Kimmel School of Perfect Acting” about “the greatest acting school there ever was…or ever will be,” according to Benedict Cumberbatch. It included testimonials from Cumberbatch, Lupita Nyong’o, Mila Kunis, Harvey Weinstein, Jeff Bridges, Kristen Bell, Susan Sarandon, Jennifer Anniston, Gary Oldman, Sean Penn, Matt Damon (excuse me – Matt Damen), Emily Blunt, and more.

Watch the videos here below.

The most important piece of acting advice from Jim Kimmel (complete with pretentious shades, toe shoes, and beret):

-Every minute you are not acting…..you are dying.”

Here are only a few of the funny highlights:

-He tries to teach British actor Eddie Redmayne to speak like “a fancy British man,” but throws a bottle at him when he fails.

-To Kristen Bell: “Speak up, muppet baby.”

-Distrust falls with Jennifer Aniston.

-He hands Susan Sarandon a measuring cup and tells her to “fill it with tears.”

-He makes Gary Oldman try to act his way out of a literal giant paper bag!

-Sean Penn: “The pool noodle is the only way I can learn.” That’s right. That’s a sentence uttered by Sean Penn.

-“Jim is the dude behind the dude, not in the gay way,” claims Jeff Bridges.

Every sliver of this bit was crafted with thought, even the Inside the Actor’s Studio-ish opening that flashed the “greats” including the not-Balki guy from Perfect Strangers. Thank you, Jimmy Kimmel.

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The Kimmel School of Perfect Acting PART 1

Almost every Academy Award-winning actor has someone to whom they owe a great debt, which is why we’re taking time to honor a man who influenced more of them than anyone. His name is Jim Kimmel. It is time to pay tribute to the greatest, most prolific and revered acting coach who ever lived. This tribute features Benedict Cumberbatch, Lupita Nyong’o, Harvey Weinstein, Mila Kunis, Eddie Redmayne, Jeff Bridges, Kristen Bell, Susan Sarandon, Jennifer Aniston and Gary Oldman.

The Kimmel School of Perfect Acting PART 2

Part two of our tribute to the greatest, most prolific and revered acting coach who ever lived – Jim Kimmel. He’s touched so many lives and launched so many notable careers that we could not fit them all into one segment. This tribute features Sean Penn, Harvey Weinstein, Matt Damon, Jeff Bridges, John Krasinski, Emily Blunt, Gary Oldman and Lupita Nyong’o.

[Source: Jimmy Kimmel Live YouTube]